Jonathan Coulton - Baby Got Back

LA face with the Oakland booty

I like big butts and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face

You get sprung and you wanna pull up tough
You notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring

Oh babe, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your pretty picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But that butt you got makes me so horny

Ooh, Rumple-smooth-skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
Cause you ain't that average groupie

I've seen them dancing
The hell with romancing
Cause she's sweat, wet,
Got it going like a turbo Vette

I'm tired of magazines
Saying flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back

So, fellas, fellas
Has your girlfriend got the butt?
Tell her to shake it, shake it
Shake that healthy butt
Baby got back

I like them round and big
And when I'm throwing a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm acting like an animal
Now here's my scandal

I wanna get you home
And wo, double-up, wo-oo-wo
I ain't talking bout Playboy
Cause silicone parts are made for toys

I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Jonnie C's in trouble
Begging for a piece of that bubble

So I'm looking at rock videos
Knock-kneed bimbos walking like hoes
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo

A word to the thick soul sistas, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna…
Til the break of dawn

Baby got it going on
A lot of simps won't like this song
Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play

Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on

So, ladies, ladies
If you wanna roll in my Mercedes
Then turn around and stick it out
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back

Actually when it comes to females, Cosmo doesn't have very much at all to do with my selection
I mean, 36-24-36? Maybe, if she's 5?3?.

So your girlfriend rolls a Honda,
Playing workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda

My anaconda don't want none
Unless you have got buns, hun
You can do side bends or sit-ups,
But please don't lose that butt

Some brothers wanna play that hard role
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and they leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it

So Cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
Cause your waist is small and your curves are kicking
And I'm thinking bout sticking

To the beanpole dames in the magazines:
You ain't it, Miss Thing
Give me a sista, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her

Some knucklehead tried to dis
Cause his girls were on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em

So ladies, if the butt is round,
And you want a triple X throw down,
Dial 1-900-JonnieC
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back

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