grandfather clock got thinner each day and they cut him up starting with his leg. he died. he died before i could understand that his blood was not my blood. i sat with my family cutting up old christmas cards because i wanted to forget so much. i wanted a town with more or less lights. your name on a wall or mine on a gravestone. i wanted him to be you. i wanted him to be you. so all of us could die together that night. so we don't have to have separate hospital beds. no we don't have to have separate hospital beds.